There was this time

Saturday nite, it was a looong busy month...
A lot things happen, but some were steady.. I still need to find some answer.. Though I may not find it soon, but I believe it exist somewhere in this universe...
There was this time when I was so young and naïve... I believe evrything in this world is as beautiful as the ocean or the sky.. But the truth is unbelievable , destructive for me..
There was this time when I started to start a lil bit naugthiest side inside of me.. Tryin a new fun in my life but evrything just came back ZERO. EmPtY. And DULL.
There was this time when I go to God for a peace in my soul, but then something just never last forever.. The trials always come no matter how hard u try....
And... There was this time... the nite when I'm feelin so lonely with a glass of liquor n a pack of cigar... Phew...
Life is sooooooo colourfull.... :)

25 tips of better life...

25 TIPS FOR A BETTER LIFE

1. Take a 10-30 minute walk every day. & while you walk, SMILE. It is the ultimate anti-depressant.

2. Sit in silence for at least 10 minutes each day.

3. When you wake up in the morning complete the following statement,
'My purpose is to __________ today.'

4. Eat more foods that grow on trees and plants and eat less food that is manufactured in plants.

5. Drink green tea and plenty of water. Eat blueberries, wild Alaskan salmon, broccoli, and almonds.

6. Try to make at least three people smile each day.

7. Don't waste your precious energy on gossip, energy vampires, issues of the past, negative thoughts or things you cannot control. Instead invest your energy in the positive present moment.

8. Eat breakfast like a king, lunch like a prince and dinner like a college kid with a maxed out charge card.

9. Life isn't fair, but it's still good.

10. Life is too short to waste time hating anyone.

11. Don't take yourself so seriously. No one else does.

12. You don't have to win every argument. Agree to disagree.

13. Make peace with your past so it won't spoil the present.

14. Don't compare your life to others. You have no idea what their journey is all about.

15. No one is in charge of your happiness except you.

16. Frame every so-called disaster with these words: 'In five years, will this matter?'

17. Forgive everyone for everything.

18. What other people think of you is none of your business.

19. Time heals everything.

20. However good or bad a situation is, it will change.

21. Your job won't take care of you when you are sick. Your friends will. Stay in touch.

22. Envy is a waste of time. You already have all you need.

23. Each night before you go to bed complete the following statements:
I am thankful for __________. Today I accomplished _________.

24. Remember that you are too blessed to be stressed.

25. Please forward this to everyone you care about.

Myday

I think I should write somethin in my blog.. I just think a new interactive way 2 xpress my feelin... So I will write down evry thought that slipped to my mind and write it down here... Like tweeterin n fb n pm - ing on blog.....

12.48am - suddenly feel losin my livin energy...
9.20pm - dang! I can't fulfill my purpose todae!

Sorry maybe I can do better tomorrow
Sent from my BlackBerry® smartphone from Sinyal Bagus XL, Nyambung Teruuusss...!

Bookworm!

Yes! Correct! I'm soon gonna drown in the pile of books! That's the 2nd book I bought in these 2 days... I still have 2 books waitin in the line and I already bought 2 more books ... Nice!!! From what I remembered... I ever bought 3 books and at the end I only read one of them :D auch... Sometimes I just need reason to read book that I don't really like it!... Phew.. I hope I can finish this! Soon! Must!
Yeepeee boooks I'm comiiiiin
Sent from my BlackBerry® smartphone from Sinyal Bagus XL, Nyambung Teruuusss...!

sorry for everything

i don't know what's going on.. i just need to say sorry to everyone... i feel like i've been doing so much mistakes... and keep on doing it....

for all the ppl there who knows me well and start to know me.. sorry for everything, for every word that i've said, things that i've done, i hope in the next and new me... i can be a better person...

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

another heart feelin

Am i in my way of destructing myself...

Lately i never can control myself, i don't know what i want or what i feel, i've been searching everywhere, talkin to every people.... once i laugh i'll forget what makes me sad.... but then those nitemare keep comin back to me... i don't know how to start trustin people i guess... or maybe for whole mylife i'll never trust anyone... 

Most people will connect me to the religion to find a peace for my soul.. my life is like pieces of puzzle that shattered everywhere... and i don't know how to start build it , where is the first piece that will connect to another piece that will make a complete picture of my life... For all this time i think i don't hve any piece that connect to other piece....  and after all this time i blame the religion that makes my life this complicated.... eveni do understand completely that Life is just a journey that i should walk in.. so simple just like we eat, breath, smile, or cryin... but why every people making it so hard to do! 

I should enjoy my life isn't it? SHOULD! but i can't every single moment that i passed it, just bring another problems...... it keeps comin back to me.. why why why why.... no one can answer it.. i'm not that kind of moaning person.... but with too much complaint.. just make me want to throw it back to the ppl who puke that complaint! aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa can i give someone love that i never had it for all my life?.......................... 

-i'm cryin from the deepest soul of my heart-

Can I ?

-Can I get my happiness with someone that hasn't understand what's the meaning of it?-
I'm in the middle of watching transformer
But my mind crossing all over things except the movie! Funny! Cos everybody is talking bout the movie... But, I'm not in the good mood for evrything!...

(Aaaaaa sam just said 'stop complaining!)

I shouldn't talk my sadness or my problems here, but no place for me to share.. I don't need a solution or someone to calm me or watever.... I just need to get this freaky things out of my mind!

I just know that many ppl haven't find the meaning of life... Isn't that what we should lookin for? Not money not all the good stuff in the world....
I hang out with someone, the X... Who loves to spend money to buy some xpensive branded things.... I've never dare 2 asked the purpose why X doing that things..

(Girls like dangerous boys! -mikaela)

Is someone get the price by outfit they used? Or by evry single xpensive things they own???
But then this is just my thought... If u can't get comfy with evry single things that u hve n tryin to fit into something that u can't even handle..... U just NOTHING ....
I hope I can change X... Can I? ................
I do miss something peacefull in my heart, mind and soul... But even I can't achieve that till the end of my life... I'm gratefull with evrything I've been through....
Evry sadness
Evry happiness
Evry joy
Evry anger, dissapointed
Evry love that I've been given or been taken from me
I'm gratefull for evry single of it!

Love! Smooooch!

steady....

Hm.. i don't hve something to share actually... but then i just want to write...
i was reading my fren's blog.. it contains some info about indies movie.. and i was attached at this quote there're some actually...

"it's like Newton's first principle; beauty is inversely proportional to brain"

"Why did God create us differently if God only wants to be worshipped one way?"
"That's why God created Love, so that those who are different can unite!"

"We have been given the privilege to learn more. Those who know nothing is easier provoked"

"God loves Cina(man) and Annisa (woman), but they cannot love each other because they call God using different names"

"Religion is the cheapest propaganda that has caused countless historical human slaughters!"

-------------- can't wait to see the movie----------------------
see youtube for the trailer
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VvXVDo3OHUs

some.. encourage...

-There is no road signs in life; no sign telling us to stop, make a right, make a left or even to slow down. There is no road map in life and not every thing in life laid out according to plan.That is what makes life interesting in one way and frightening on the other. It is really up to us to make a decision in life -

like drivin a car huh????? only without sign and rules and everything :o
Taken from someone's blog.. which i don't know where, cause the person still not telling me the address... thanks to him..


-Miss ya-

New Life

Hello,

Hold on..... I'm not having a new life I just in the middle of program that has that theme!

Yeap... That's a lil bit scary and desperate to hear..... But, maybe for some ppl this is the only way to face their problem......

I've been join this program a couple times and all of them was never comin from my request... Either my frens called me to accompany or somebody just told me to come and not need any NO answer! (It's happen to me now :p )

I know,and fully understand that all of these are important for my life but then a part of me... That I've had taken care for such a long n hard way.... I can't just let it go... Even I know somehow evrything would be okay! I'm afraid confused and feel guilty at the same time.... Yeap... Another cloudy mind.... I hope I can get through thiz....

What love can buy

Bed but not sleep

Medicine but not health

Luxuries but not culture

Amusement but not happines

Acquintance but not friends

Finery but not beauty

House but not home

Food but not appetite

Computer but not brains

SeX but not LOVE

Enjoying home all day long!

Yap... That's correct... I'm not working today.. And when I asked my mom to go shopping with me, she said she gonna take my sist for swimming, even in the end it's raining...and my sist cancelled swimming... So I end up at my room watching How I met Your Mother season 4...
There is no coincidence, evrything happen for a reason rite? Guess wat... There's been traffic evrywheree so... I was so lucky didn't go anywhere ;)
Besides, I watched a very nice series... I like the story about 3 days later... Kinda insult Jesus, but hey...they surely got a point....I'll write the complete quote... Later... But I like the other story ... Here's the quote I like : you can't plan your life..... "U can't design ur life like a building
U just hve to live it and it will design itself" --- gosh I love this word so much.. Yeap n I'm still tryin to live my life ... And try not to design or planning perfectly my entire life... I know somehow fairytales not always hve a happy ending but at least they ever felt happy... No matter what my ending... I'll take it as my design... My only design of my life -- E.O.S

!Bad mood!

Yap! I'm waking up at 5am in the morning and I feel bad... Don't ask me why cos I don't even know..Why am I feel this way... Should I cry,laugh or angry? I still not know the answer... But one thing that I know for sure that today is going to be a long daaaaay....
This couple months 'something' tryin to play with my heart.... I said something cos I'm not so sure about... Is it destiny, wishes comin true or jokes or hope or whateva.... But one thing I learn is coincidence never exist!!! Every single thing happen for a reason.... And ready or not we hve to be prepared to choose... I was thinking bout my past (I'm not looking back.....) And I finally a lil bit understand... How life sometimes play with me.... How evrything can be a big chaos.... But that's the essence of life isn't it? Without that our life would be so dull.... I was too afraid to do mistakes (who's not anyway???) And that's why I'm always standing in the very safe position, I will not get hurt... O yeah.... But I'm loosing something... When ppl stop doing mistakes... They stop learning.... Coz in the end.... The one who's going to get hurt most is ME... I don't learn anything, I left behind and I can't turn back time whatsoever!
Aaaaaaahhh I'm babbling here... Yap! Wanna know why? Bcos I hve to shout and say somethiiiiiiing.... N I've troubled all my fren a lot with all my babbling before :(....
Tiredddddd.... Better stop here or I'm gonna crush my cellphone :)

Ending n Beginning

Phew... Been so stress... I hve to ended my loooong relationship bcos there is no future for us both... But then isomething cross in my mind... Is the future things only my selfishness? Or is it a fact? Am I not trying so hard to fight for my relationship? Or I just haven't felt love that could make me sacrifice evrything.. But, it's done... I already said it... Then why something feels empty inside me... My fren said it's a normal thing to feel like that.. I'm still a human... even there's nothing to lose and the decision is pure out from my mouth... I just felt sorry for him... In the other hand.... Thanks to evryone who's been supporting me to ended this complicated relationship... Cos I should've ended long long time ago when I realize that there's no future for us.... I hate this part.... :) hope there is a new love for me.... N for him ......

-negative thought-

Wake up in the morning and I hve to hear some theory bout the negativenesss (is that word exist??) Well I've had fun thin month but hearing such a negative thought makes me wanna shouted n said come ooooonnn dude.. What's going on wit u!?! Life isn't and never gonna be easy but we hve to look in positive ways, at least.. Gosh I just really need time to relax... I'm waiting for end of july huaaaaaa... Oh and I hope my brain, mind, and soul won't be contaminated with such a bad thinking way....

~am i guilty?!~

Hello,

been through a lot this month... yeap.... i feel like i'm in a new chapter of my life or is it just a prologue? and i hven't even started anything..... :)

I've been looking into myself.. deeply... there is a bitch complaining about the way i am... and one of my fren said that perhaps if she too much complaining i hve to look back to myself am i losing my control or did wrong, is she said a truth or just a bluff???.... thanks to my fren... cos i've been thinking a lot... and maybe i'm a lil bit of losing my control.... but i'm just a human... trying to be a better person....
but then.... i just can't forgive the way the bitch treat me.... i'll prove it that i can improve a lot better..
we'll seee just seeeeee HUAHAHAHAHHAHAHAH phewwww

nobody likes to be complained rite? even if we're truly wrong LOL... yeap... I'm just expressing the way i am.. but accept a complain from someone that has more more more more mistakes than me.. can i????? i'm sad, angry, but yet try to think..... can't i just make mistakes and fix it later?
just don't answer it.... :)

~i miss you~

It's been too long and I'm lost without you
What am I gonna do
Said I've been needin you
(Said I'm needin you)
Wantin you
Wonderin if you're the same and
Who's been with youIs your heart still mine
(Is your heart still mine)

I wanna cry sometimes
I miss you
Off to college
Yes you went away
Straight from highschool
You up and left me
We were close friends also lovers
Did everything for one another
Now you're gone
And I'm lost without you here now
But I know I gotta live and make it somehow

[Bridge]
Come back to me(to me)
Can you hear me (callin)
Hear me callin (for you) for youcuz it's

[Chorus]
It's been too long and I'm lost without you
What am I gonna do Said I've been needin you
Ooh...Ooh
Wantin you
Wonderin if you're the same and
Who's been with you
Is your heart still mine
(Is your heart still mine)
I wanna cry sometimes
I miss you
Now I'm sittin here
Thinkin bout you
And the days we used to share
It's drivin me crazy I don't know what to do
I'm just wonderin if you still care
And I don't want to let you knowthat it's killin me
I know you got another life
And gotta concentrate baby


>>>>>>. for someone out there who missed someone.... <<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<

~Balance LIfe~

~opening theme song... supermassive blackhole:MUSE~

Wow... i can say this week is a really meaningfull week for me... people said that life's round like a circle... this week that happen to me.. i've been up and down but that makes me realize that i have colourful life like everyone else and my life ain't dull...... the best part is this week start with sad things and ended with happy things........... BUT (there's always but for everything isn't it....)

for those who read my previous diary... could notice that i'm a kind of person that hard to appreciate my life... not because i life in a hard position but i've been hard on myself.... for the pressure i had. okay sooo... the BUT is...

This happy feeling that i had.. is not a fair, true, or a right thing that i supposed to do.... maybe...
but the guilty n the pleasure.... is the best thing that i've ever felt since the last time i have it....and i think i still can manage that.. hope this is just my way to find the meaning of my life... i'm searching, hunting, and trying to be a better person.... I believe i will

We never know if we doing any mistake before we've done it...
Never trying something that you can do is the biggest mistake u'll done in ur life..... :)
for those bad or good is not our power to judge it.....
Peace ^_^

~~~many many thanks to someone who hold my secret ~~~~~~~~ luv ya X.O.X.O

Ouch how I want this

Whew...
I really want this thing... I don't know why
I'm on my shop diet.. More exactly is parfume shopping diet... So far I can manage my wanted... But then.. Some evil bring this things and I..... Crushed lol
I guess I'm gonna buy it... If I'm not forgot lol... I like pretty things and this one so pretty

Weird feelings

Wow... these past 4 days been busy for me....
i hve to deal with my sis disease and my work...
my students hve exam and i have to prepare the practice for them..
can't sleep well of course. and I hve a lil fever here
so then.. my problem is ... I have a very super sensitive things with one of parent...
i dunno what did i do wrong.. but she seems avoid me..... but then i don't want to think about it
n it;s happen 2nd time.. and i still gonna hve to meet about 6 more times this month..
that means.... i have to say shit everytime i go there..... :)

never mind... i've been hard to myself lately... things happen so fast and i change myself, i denied a couple things i love to do and not so idealist anymore.. if i were a 'matter' i will be in gas state now.... and long time ago i was in solid state....
how come that happen... sometimes i missed myself back then when i'm in high school.. i have faith, i have fun, i have events too.... now.... older enough to understand a couple things in life.. only makes everything gone bad... i closed my treasure box and stop playing with my dream :(
sad isn't it... some ppl never want to admit that they life in the shadow... and sometimes all the success ppl live in their dream to.. they see world as a happy beautifull place.. but me... i see this.. as a big mess.. chaos... just wait to see when something will crash one click...

yeah.... sounds crap?!? the one who thinks this is a crap... they have crappier thought than this world already has.... u knowwww.... just admit it... it;s hard to see things go to an end when u haven't get anything done... but what's done? nobody know.... yeah nor u nor me......

superstitious

woah... it's been the 2nd day.. since my lil sister in hospital.... and for a thousand times i'll repeat it that I hate hospital....
I'm in a good condition when i enter that room.. and this morning i came home with a lil bit heat on my body.... and i can't take care my sister now... zzzz really miss her...
Okay the reason about why i hate hospital so much is because a "fairytale" that my mom ever told me... LOL.. actually it's a ghost story about how many times she saw 'things' in hospital.. and it came in a Nurse shape... geeeezz.. so for a long nite, i was awake... wondering if the nurse that came to check my sis is a person or a 'beeeeeeep' and here i am laying on my own bed typing in my blog.. that hopefully my sister will get well sooon ....

i miss u my cutie lil sister that sometimes annoyed me with her own jokes... love ya.......

Songs.... :)

Recently i've been hearing this song..... regularly LOL

Rihanna - Hate on The club
Now this be the last time you did me wrong
No more laying up in your arms
No calling, saying you want me back
I'm packing my bags, what you think about that?
Stayed at home like a good girl do
But Tonight baby you got me sad and blue
I just heard about the girl in your car now, kissing at the bar
Got me crying

[Chorus:]
Ohhh, you got me hatin' on the club
'Cause you took my love
Oh you took my love
Now you got me like whoahhh
You got me hatin' on the club
'Cause you took my love
Why'd you have to take my loveWhoahh

And you can be mad at me all you
ain't coming in, I'll be waiting out front
Coming out the door with your girlfriend
You did me wrong boy tell me where our love is
I Stayed at home like a good girl do
But Tonight baby you got me sad and blue
I just heard about the girl in your car now, kissing at the bar
Got me crying

back to [Chorus:]

Now this is the sound of a broken heart
There's only one reason why we're apart
She never woulda made it to your car
If it wasn't for the club, I'd still have my
would still have usI'd still have my love
We would still have us
But now we're like whoahhhh
Ohhh, you got me hatin' on the club'Cause you took my love
Oh you took my loveBut now, now we're like whoahhh
You got me hatin' on the clubYou took my loveOh you took my love

~luv it~

I'm tired

Yeap I'm still in my bad mood for my period and sometimes I feel like I don't really want to ........ Never mind....
I just feel a lil bit jealousy with some of my frens... Yeah... I hve a bad feeling that I couldn't get my happily ever after life... Yeap that thing only a fairytale.... But then how I should go on with my life... When nothing I could do for changing it to better.... I don't have enough power to do or maybe I just wish that the world end soon, so I don't hve to do anything....

Gyahahahahhaha- pathetic square.... Geeez....

~imitation of life~

HI there... yeap... today i'm in my lowest mood which means... i really want to vanished from this world... like jumper maybe.... sometimes i'm thinking about how it would feel to erase someone entirely from this world.. not only death, but all about that particular person.... from memories and so on. If God really write everything on it, He could erase it... but people need to adapt which only can be learned by previous action... no memories mean nothing gonna move forward...

Well the reason i've been sensitive about my life is... actually i should be happy rite.. but nobody is happy enough with their life.. there always a thousand reason to deny a happiness.
Okay.. so the reason is.. are.. perhaps... :) hatred toward some ppl.... i've been underestimated about my ability in my field... i'm a tutor but yet one 'biatch' who also a tutor makes a statement about tutor is a fake teacher.. gosh..... what the hell wrong with you... eating her own shit...
and now i've been thinking to become a teacher... but i don't want my reason to be a teacher is because that biatch statement...
the other reason maybe these past days i loss my confidence.. like i've been try so hard but then it's not enough to impress no improvement... i think i'm gonna change my mood tomorrow
i don't like ppl anymore.. and i want to be a mean person... ------ that is only my thought.. lol that's why before all of my thought become real, i want to vanished... could someone erase me??? just erase... forget that i ever lived in this world...

hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

Reader!!

I just read this blog when i'm googling some movie... it's shinjuku incident.. says in wikipedia that TAKIZAWA HIDEAKI cast on that movie... i wonder which cast is he play... :) anyone can answer this? btw i read this article :

According to J.A. O’Brien, a reading instruction expert, There are essentially 3 different types of readers ( our unique reading styles are influenced by this, according to him) and they are:
Motor Readers - Motor readers are lip movers or vocalizers. Such readers are extremely slow readers as they accompany their reading with various movements of the muscles of articulation. As a result, their speed of reading slows down because they artificially keep their speed down to the rate at which they can pronounce words. Moreover, since there is so much muscular activity involved in their reading, motor readers tire quickly. Motor readers make frequent regressions, for their eyes tend to rush ahead and their voice stays behind. These readers often take the help of their finger to keep a track of their reading and to stay where on the word where there voice is. All this leads to poor comprehension for their mind is as much involved with the mechanics of reading as it is with ideas.
Auditory Readers - Auditory readers "hear" the words they read, but they do not sub-vocalize to themselves. They are very much aware of saying words in their mind, although their speech organs are completely at rest. This means, that they do not actually pronounce each word aloud but only imagine the pronunciation. Auditory readers are mush more skillful and rapid. Auditory reading is faster than motor reading.
Visual Readers - Visual reading is the fastest. Visual readers do not "hear" what they are reading. They simply see a word and understand its meaning. Visual readers understand words and phrases without saying and hearing them. They read with their eyes and mind, not with their mouths or ears.
Credits to Namrata Mathur
So, what type of reader are you?

I hate this part in my houz 2

Geez... Thought this perhaps a hundreds times I feel very annoyed... I'm in my gold cage, I feel safe but then I hve to follow orders, rules and so whatever... SUCKS



saving for future is one of things that I don't like to think about... If I could choose I prefer not having my future... Sorry for ppl who really want to live 4eva, but I absolutely don't agree..... But I can't ending mylife myself for that is a sin to do that. But I have a strong feeling that I hve my bomb.. Whatever the trigger it will soon vanished me from this world lol. Geez.... I'm talkking crap and yes... All ppl surround me is a crap and they are making me feel the crap's of world .........

Why physics is so hard!!

Hyaaaa I hate physics...

Newtonian mechanic things..

It's just another junior high school questions but then this simple machine lever things is sooooo CRAP

extra ordinary strange day.... ?!?!?

Hi there.. wow i guess it's too late now. But then i feel so terrible if i'm not write anything todae

I'm trying to adapt myself to my new netbook. Kind of hard using it but i love it.. i just fell in love and it's pink lol. Hm been talking to my friend about life, God, relationship n so on..

Well this week i can say.. that my job isn't fun for me.. i feel a lil bit tension there. The good news is i got extra long weekend because of the election .... and easter of course...

Talking bout easter... this year perhaps is the first year of my easter without any routine tradition in catholic... for more than 10 years i've been doing that on and on.. sometimes makes me sick... but then... kind of missing it.... but just a little... because somehow i can't manage my believe in all those celebration anymore... yeah... i lost it.. the feeling of easter and christmas. Should i pity myself? perhaps.. but then i should pity the people who're going to church without realising that they're no heart in there... at least i know that i don't like being trap in one tradition without understand what is the meaning.

I hve a lil bit quote here :

"How evil is possible in the world if God is all-good and all-powerful. After all, if God is all-powerful, then the evil in this world is His responsibility and He cannot therefore be all-good. If God is all-good then He cannot be all-powerful, for He allows evil to exist in the world."

Who can answer that??? i can't n i don't want to try to answer that either...

that quote is from shawni book's called The End of Reason... i have the book in my language (indonesian) and i hve to admit it I like to read it again and again.. not for judging God or try not to believe it.. the books.. really good for questioning my faith.... maybe someday i can find the truth, but i rather to keep it like that.. as a mystery....

hoamh so sleepy need to go to bed.........

nite ^^

crying... i"m so sad :((

Hello

I'm in the very super really bad mood

Well I guess I was happier yesterday!

Below is one of my book that I bought a long long time ago, n I still haven't got any chanve to read it.. I hope it's nice :)

Here comes the synopsis :

"Lady Constance Keeble, sister of Lord Ermsworth of Blanding Castle, has both an imperious manner and a valuable diamond necklace. The precarious peace of Blandings is shattered when her necklace become the object of dark plottings, for within the castle lurk some well-connected jewel thieves-among them the Honourable Freddie Threepwood, Lord Emsworth's younger son, who wants the reward money to set up a bookmaking business. Psmith, the elegant socialist, is also after it for his newly married chum Mike. And on patrol with the impossible task of bringing management to Blandings is the efficient Baxter, whose striving for order lead to a memorable encounter with the castle flowerpots......"

A witch!

' A witch description from Paulo C, was a person who never complied with the established rules, and always tried to dare and to go beyond and to celebrate life, and to love and to have joy and pleasure while doing this'



Whay a complicated description! No wonder there is a conclusion that ppl never accept simple and took the complicated one....but I understand this logically than the other 'witch' that I've known sonce childhood. :)

Another simple explanation from witch could be connect to a witchcraft like ghost, or supernatural things..... Well there are always two sides of evrything...

~so sleepy~

My new netbook

This is my new lnovo netbook yippi

Just bought it... And I'm replacing my old Acer... Well I haven't play with this cos I haven't make the recovery disc back up for the windows part... Hope I soon can use it

Gya gya gya.........

Smooch

X.O.x.o

Sent from my QooBerry® smartphone from Sinyal Mahal XL, Jarang Nyambung Karna Mahal...!

I'm testing my blog

Hi there try to posting it through my cellphone

Is it work???????

Btw that is my ELLE watch that I took it from my sister hihihi. She didn't like it though

Sent from my QooBerry® smartphone from Sinyal Mahal XL, Jarang Nyambung Karna Mahal...!

What do you want?

'What do you want? You can't want to be happy, because that's too easy and too boring. You can't want only to love, bcause that's impossible. What do you want? You want to justify your life, to live it as intensely as possible. That is at once a trap and a source of ecstasy. Try to be alert to that danger, and experience the joy and the adventure of being that woman who is beyond the image reflected in the mirror.'

-The witch of Portobello; Paulo Coelho -

Another miserable day!

Today... is a public holiday for Hindu's ppl. It's called Nyepi... or can be translated as Silence?
well in Bali this things will extremely different than the other days, but here in jakarta, just as crowded as any other days...

Anyway... i hate when my parents urrr no 'S' i guess.. cos only 1 person dominant for that ability..., okay i hate when parent messing up with my life.. control this and that.. I really don't like but i can't say even just a word to protest :p.. well that's the power of parent i guess. I just can shouted at HEreeeeeeeeeeeeee AAAAAaaaaaaaaarrrrrrrrrrgggghhhhhh.
why why why and why. so many things i haven't done bcos they created so many boundaries.. sometimes i wish i was a rebell daughter.. maybe my life would even worse than now, but at least somehow i learn to fix it. Right now? I feel like i'm living in a gold cage.. a step that i taken always counted perfectly safe. no challenge, no damage, and no risk of course. But then, it's too late for me to regret every single step that i've taken... for i can't turn back time. :)

Well enough for that... i'm reading a book... by Paulo Coelho ; The witch of Portobello. Like any other his book, this one is very meaningfull too.. kind of describe my day.. but not that extreme..
maybe i'll write down some quote on the book someday...... :)
gotta go reading again.. just feel some mess up in my head......

luv.....Qoo

2 am and i'm awake!

GEez such a week...
got through a lot of things. I kind of hate March now! it started with the accident...
and all the problems with the 'female dog' with hundreds of faces who talk about God and be such a super innocent saint person in this world!!!!!!!

well can't talk much about that. the enjoyable moment just when i hve unlimited internet yay!
and i kind of watch the series now.. pretty cool. called numb3rs. i know i've been so late to follow cos it's already season 5.. but yeah i enjoy it a lot.

n it;s spooky i got called by some private no calling at 1 am.. geez i don't say any hello then just hear a bunch of voices ....

ummm o yeah congrats to my fren wedding yesterday... have a happy marriage forever......!!!

hmm i should sleep now! but my anger put me in a hard position for that!
gotta go then .. byeeeeee

-shocking car accident-

Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
this is my glooooomy day
i hate this day... zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz
got a car accident, a motorcycle hit my car.. .my window broke into pieces n i'm in shock

got nothing to say... i just hate that guy and everyone who like tracking in main road F**K them
and go to heeeeeeeeellllllllllllll

where my money goes to... Part 1

I just saw a blog and suddenly i want to list all my belonging here..
I bought some cosmetics lately ...

these things i bought between December 2008-February 2009

From left :

1. Bourjois - eyeshadow 54 marron glace.

i'm tryin to make some goldy brown smokey eyes, but i failed so i bought another eyeshadow

2. NYX - triple shadow orange/golden orange/peach.

i think this is very bad shadow.. i dunno why just don't like it... then one day I saw this...

3. Laneige - snow eye palette - pink, gold, purple ... so nice

n then i have dior mini series.... luv them so ooo oo o o MUCH XOXO

from up to bottom :

Dior Kiss- 008-sorbet meringue

Dior Addict ultra gloss - 257

Dior Addict ultra gloss - 227

Dior 5 colour eyeshadow - 030 - incognito

Diorshow mascara blackout

I'm so addicted to them, i kind of using one of them everyday.. so i'm not regret of buying these dior thinggy :)

I'm a parfume collector too, and i'm so into this YSL - ELLE .. but because i still think of not to buy the parfume, i bought the lotion. for my changing mood I also wear D&G - the one lotion
smells nice.. brighten up my day

And... currently i'm using this ARMANI - CODE .. i kinda like the bottle, it looks misterious and elegant dark blue... the smells.. hum so sophisticated, not too sweet yet it feels fresh

I hve 2 choices when i bought Armani parfumes, between Code or Diamond (i like the bottle really looks like a diamond... a very big diamond LOL) but later when i use both of them i don't really like the diamond.

so i choose code instead of diamond...

kinda sleepy sloopy now. i'm gonna continue my list tomorrow...

it;s mitnite

yeap been watching these movie
* Disaster movie
* Burn After Reading
*Passengers..

I like the last one MOST... the story bout someone who died but not realised it. hiks
is after death life really like that... i never think about how is it gonna be the life after dead...
most ppl did, but I... just don't like to think about it. Maybe ppl around me gonna be sad but ... life goes on, soon they'll forget somehow.

Disaster Movie... i think it's the sequel of Epic movie, Meet the Spartan, Superhero Movie.
but it's the worst i guess... the story line too forcing.. n don't connect each other.. I like umm epic movie best. second superhero movie.. For disaster movie.. i like the part when they make HSM as a parody, they really make the song heard like the original... and the main actor is good looking too... he play well... overall it's entertaining :)

Burn After Reading - Only Brad pitt makes me stay on this MOVIE!!!!!!!!!!! argh.............
they want to make fun of CIA but it's really weird.. yeah well just a movie...

well time to sleeeeeep :)

Now i knoe....

Happy nu year 2009 ALL.......
gosh it moves fast! yeap just another year past on ...

Got a happy and sad story,,, for this changing year... Noe i knoe the frens that just comin in need and not in deed :( my best frenz (for these past years i believe they were )..
But then the happy things are... i spent my new years eve with my bff hahahaha... She's everything that frens need... LOL...
Bout my frens... a bunch of guys... i'm hoping that somehow they will gave me an explanation bout the absence... but then i think it's over now.. They just a normal people now... a ppl that i know the name ... but i don't really know them! a perfect stranger for me!
aaah i hve the other fren too, she's been missing somehow.. i don't even know where she was but i think she has the reason (i still hoping that this positive thought can be rite). n i still pray for her, hope she can get through all of these hard times... :)

btw... the happy things are....... i played fireworks.. with my sister ... that's so fun... really fun cool and the best things is my sister were really happy... she's crying a lot to play that fireworks.. :)
a little travelling around city today and still she's so happy :)

urgh i'm so tired, a little bit sick too... think need some rest!